Boundaries

One thing that I have learned with homeschooling is the need to set boundaries. Some people who don't understand what homeschooling is about think that I'm at home all day and that it's an easy drop off for kids or that I just add them in the mix with mine.

While I love being able to be helpful to others, I have had to learn to say no on many occasions because my family comes first, and just like families who send their children to school, we are schooling here and working hard. {whether or not it looks like it}

Here are some things that I did to set better boundaries for myself and for my family.

*I will always help in an emergency. You have to take one kid to ER, bring me the others. Things happen and I am at home and will gladly take extra kids if something happens. A hair appointment, lunch date with the husband, or even a trip to the dentist that you forgot to schedule child care for is NOT an emergency {the whole "Failure to prepare on your part does not make an emergency on my part"} I am not a drop of service because you forgot to find someone to watch your children.

* I don't take phone calls from anyone except the husband. Everyone else I let go to voicemail. I'll listen to the message and then decide if I need to call them back. Even family. Most people know my schedule so I usually don't get phone calls in the morning when we school. But the time is for the kids and not for me to chit-chat with friends.

*There is a double standard.... I'm sorry but for me there is. I will more readily watch another homeschooler during the week than I will public school kids of the same age. I can ask the mom to pack some work for their kid to do and I know that it will get done. Or if we are working on a science project or listening to a book I know that they are going to jump right in with us. I have had bad experiences trying to keep other kids out of the toys while the boys are trying to finish their math. Yes we are relaxed but we have to get stuff done as well.

*My time is valuable, I am learning that I can say "if you want to drop something off you need to do it at this time." I can't be waiting around all day for you. I know that things come up, but I am not switching around our routine or the baby's nap for unnecessary reasons.

*Putting notes on the door for the neighbor kids does work. We started school a little early do to some random breaks that we are taking {moving, and the baby}. I couldn't have the neighbors coming by and breaking up our routine. A note on the door let every one know what was going on and I didn't have to answer the door 400 times a day.

There are always exceptions to the rules and sometimes I am to do things out of the what I normally would do. But these are the rules I try to follow, it makes it easier for me and for others to know where I stand.